Episode 09 - Sober Travel Ft. Rob

Episode 09 - Sober Travel Ft Rob. Show notes
The topic for today is about how to plan a sober trip and some tips and tricks for success. We also talk about our recent meet-up in NY and how we stayed sober throughout that adventure.
In this episode we are joined by Rob.  Rob has  4+ years of sobriety, part of Recovery Elevator, where we all met. Rob is into camping, hiking, travel with his wife a sons.
Rob talks about how food in new places is something he is really into in sobriety. Taylor talked about the lack of expectations on the trip, which allowed him to be flexible.  All agree that this trip was an example of not needing alcohol to have fun.   
Eric and Taylor talk about how drinking would have derailed a late night trip to the Brooklyn Bridge.
Getting to meetings when traveling. Eric describes the meeting they went to in midtown. 
Looking for meetings and staying accountable to each other becomes part of traveling sober.
Being present and authentic while traveling is a great place to be. Being with people in sobriety is like being with old friends
Eric asks How do you manage the temptations  of drinking when on vaca?
Rob found it tough when he went to Mexico during covid. Worried that he would get served, so he told them he had an allergy to alcohol.
The guys share travel experiences and compare sober vs. drinking  What are things to do on vacations How drinking interferes with travel fun
Criteria for sober travel. have a plan, be flexible/minimize expectations, accountability. set priorities.
Don't need to be in the drinking story anymore.  Being Authentic is so much easier.
In sobriety, the universe works with you.
We tend to focus on the negative and not the positives that are happening
The John's Pizza story. (Photo per Taylor) Taylor reads post he made.
Open to the universe when sober.
Special Vaca Apps.
AA app: Meetings or everything AA
App: Meetup
Cruises will have "Friends of Bill" AA meetings
Use Google search to find meetings
Bands have Sober fan groups
Rob: many sober groups
Sobriety is everywhere.
Thank you to Rob and all our listeners.
Host's and Show Social Media
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IG @sobernshameless
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buymeacoffee.com
klingercrafted
ericandrewcoaching12@gmail.com
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FB Eric Andrew Coaching
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Transcript

S&S EP09

Host - Taylor: [00:00:00] Sober and Shameless, episode nine.

Hey everybody. Welcome to the show. I'm Taylor Klinger. And I'm Eric. Andrew. And this is Sober and Shameless shedding the Shame, the podcast that flips the script on what it means to live a sober life. In each 

Host - Eric: episode of Sober and Shameless, the host, along with the occasional guests, will pick a topic to shed their shame about, explore ideas on how to grove through those challenges, and provide organic, 

Host - Taylor: lighthearted, 

Host - Eric: honest, and unprofessional commentary about their experiences with addiction, strength through recovery, and life 

Host - Taylor: and sobriety.

Hey, what's going? Hey, hey, hey. What's going? What's up? What's up? What's up? Happy. Be Friday, happy Friday for all those listeners out there [00:01:00] and happy. What is it actually, what, Tuesday night for us here in the, uh, booth. 

Host - Eric: Oh, I thought we were supposed to kind of make it seem like it 

Host - Taylor: was always Friday. I mean, it's always Friday in my mind.

Like, you know, I think that's a, that's a healthy way to be. It's always Friday inside my mind. A hundred percent. Well, this is our first episode back from our trip from the lovely New York, I think a couple episodes. New York. New York. I had said, yeah, I think a couple episodes I had said that, uh, I was coming out to visit Eric and I actually brought somebody home with me.

Our guest today, Rob, how are you, Rob? Rob? 

Guest - Rob: I'm living the dream. What a great trip. Was that fun or what? 

Host - Taylor: It was a, it was a lot of fun. Yeah, it was a lot of fun. I think that's what we're gonna get in and talk about today. But first and foremost, before we talk about our lovely adventures of New York and our topic [00:02:00] for sober travel, let's get to know Rob a little bit.

Uh, Rob, tell us a little bit about yourself before we get started. 

Guest - Rob: I am in Littleton, Colorado, a suburb of Denver. So I have, I have been in this recovery thing. I'm coming up on four years. Woo. I think Taylor and I are really close. Couple, couple, like a week apart or something like 

Host - Taylor: that? I think so. Uh, you are, what's your June?

What's June 5th. You're June 5th, yep. Yeah. And I am June 8th, 2019. Wow. We're even closer 

Guest - Rob: than a week. Three days. Yeah. That's amazing. I have been part of Recovery Elevator since September of 19 and have just loved that, uh, use a lot of tools, but that has probably been my main community and connection and I'm sure we'll talk about, uh, how that all looks like when we [00:03:00] travel and just spur of the moment all show up to meet somebody coming from another country that we've never met and , which I would've never done before, cuz I would've had too much drinking to do on the weekends and take off for New York or whatever.

Um, married, we've got two kids, they're both grown on the nest. Uh, I've got a great dog who we got noise canceling on because he was just Alan at the fire truck. , he's a little wack. But yeah, I mean, I'm a motorcycles. Anybody that knows me would, would say, oh, please don't bring up motorcycles around him.

And then closely behind, that's probably travel camping. And a lot of my motorcycle stuff is travel, but camping with my wife, traveling with my wife, her family will all live in France, so I get to go there every year. Oh, wow. And so nothing against having to go to someplace like Banertt, Ohio, but I'm lucky in my wife's family's all in the south of [00:04:00] France, so, uh, yeah, I live, live in a, a, a really nice little life since I've been in recovery.

Had a night and day difference as I look back. Um, yeah, I, I wouldn't change a thing. This has been, um, you know, it's not been easy on paper. A lot of stuff's happened, a lot of stuff thrown at me. Life's been life. But, um, man, at the end of the day, I. It's just so much easier. , it's so much better than it used to be.

Host - Taylor: Right? Yeah. In it. Well, and I think Eric and I have talked about this a few times. You know, it's, it's hard to get sober, but it's also hard to stay drunk. And I would pick this hard any day over the alternative. And the hard initially ends up turning into a preferred method of easiness as we continue down this road.

It's just like you said, night and day 

Guest - Rob: for anybody that's, you know, early in on this, I'm, I'm always [00:05:00] very careful to, to be as understanding and comforting and, and let them remember that just cuz I'm, I'm coming up on four years doesn't mean that those initial 30, 60, 90 days weren't, well, they were terrible, but I had to do it because, like you said, Taylor, the, the alternative, the hard of the route I was taking, I hit some, some brick walls.

My wife had left me. He since has come back, but I had to but anybody listening to us four years, you know, cuz we're all Eric just celebrated his congrats. Thank that. Didn't come easy, but it, it does get better. It does get easier. So you've gotta do the hard stuff up front as you guys talk about, get your tools and do all these things that you've gotta do so that you can start enjoying life.

Because trust me, promises are true that things get, uh, a lot better. Doesn't mean life's going to [00:06:00] treat you with, you know, fuzzy slipper bunnies and pink unicorns and all that and all that stuff. Puppies. And although I did get a puppy and had that puppy, you did get a puppy. That's why I'm 

Host - Taylor: laughing.

Guest - Rob: who's now too. But yeah, it's, it, it definitely gets better. So hang in there if you guys are out, out there still. Just starting up. 

Host - Eric: You brought up a, a really interesting point because I, I know a lot of times, and we're talking obviously about sober travel and how we navigate through that in recovery, but you brought up a good point about, you know, you mentioned 30, 60, 90 days and how tough that is.

Mm-hmm. , but a lot of people that come in early and are in that time slot, I've had this asked to me quite a bit is, well, wait a second. Do you like finally get to a place where you don't have to do any of this stuff? That you don't have to worry about these things or, or do all of that? And I always say the answer is kind of a couple of answers.

One, [00:07:00] no, you never really get to a spot with that. But two, everything starts to make a lot more sense. And when you're planning a trip, it becomes natural to just plan. , Hey, I'm not drinking, so here's the things I'm gonna go and do. You know, and this is what I wanna do. And talk about all of that. In terms of, uh, how you plan to explore a city like New York as a sober person.

Well, 

Guest - Rob: number one, this probably is my third love of my life, you know, past my, my wonderful wife and motorcycles in traveling food . Yeah. So anybody that knows me and New York is just incredible. And I'm not talking bougie. $400 a plate, drizzle, slop on the top floor or something. Four star Michelin. I'm talking street food.

And we have another friend there Will, who has been, uh, . He's, he's a God. And so he always [00:08:00] just kinda leads us around. He led us around, he led me around. I took my son the year before, just kind of a spur of the moment, sitting around. And I do a lot of motorcycle riding with my other son. And my oldest is into food and he was watching all this New York Street food stuff on YouTube and Munchies and some of the other shows, and we just spur them up.

You want to go? Yes. So we went and 8, 8 8. Slice of pizza. How many slice of pizzas did we have? Taylor? Right outside our front door to the right and down at half block . 

Host - Taylor: Oh my goodness, man. It was, it was so much and so good and I can't tell you how amazing of a trip it was and how unexpected things were like, and I love the topic and I definitely wanna like get into that more.

But a quick sidebar here for myself and my experience and how everything went. Getting to meet Eric was amazing. [00:09:00] Not meet him. Actually, I've met you before. Nevermind. You know what? Scratch everything I just said. Screw you. You know, getting to actually see where Eric lives and go to a side of the United States I'd never ever been to before.

I've only seen that stuff, like I said in like episode two in movies, you know? But outside of that, Expectations on sober travel and things like that. My expectation level was zero. And that came from training in sobriety to not have standards with this stuff and let things flow. Initially I was supposed to stay with Eric and soon I realized, wait a minute, Rob, who lives not that far from me.

And I've known about Rob. I've hung out with Rob a couple of times from sober trips here and there in the local area from hiking, things like that. But I didn't really know him too well. And one thing led to another. And next thing you know, we're roommates. and we're adventuring together on this entire New York trip [00:10:00] unexpectedly.

It just, the logistics worked out easier that way with where Eric's located and where all the events were gonna be happening, he still had to work. And so being open and free to allow that stuff to be as it was and as it ended up happening, Rob, it was so awesome to be able. Jump aboard the a la carte train of food experiences and late night, let's just jump on the subway.

Hit the, hit the fuck it button and you know, just travel around and see things. Brooklyn It and Brooklyn. Yeah, the 

Guest - Rob: Brooklyn Bridge. Brooklyn. The Brooklyn Bridge Park. Yeah. At night. The first night. I'm dragging your ass, Claire over there. You're wanting to slow down. I'm Likeuh. You're gonna follow this 58 year old all over New York.

Host - Taylor: I was all about it, man. I was all about it and I just wanted to like caveat everything with that. Real quick to just kind of give a little bit of a picture of what exactly went down and. [00:11:00] You know, Eric and I weren't actually able to end up recording there like we had initially planned, but every single day for like four days, we hung out.

And another big factor in all of this was a mutual friend of all of us came all the way from Scotland. His name's Craig came from all the way from Scotland. He, he means a lot to all of us in the world of recovery in different ways. And hence, family was gonna be in town. And the way this sober community works is we, we all hit the fuck it button and we're like, if we can go and meet somebody that is also sober, there is just no leaps o there's no limitations to.

Is possible. Once you realize that there are other people that are sober too and you get that narrative out of your brain that I think we're all thinking about right now. And that narrative is what the fuck am I supposed to do now if I can't drink? What do you do sober? How can I [00:12:00] even go anywhere and have fun?

Well, this is an example. Prime. Yep. And everything. You know, we're gonna talk about our experience today, uh, experiences that led up to this stuff. But yeah, it's so awesome. 

Guest - Rob: I got rid of my king size bed cuz I wasn't about to spoon with Taylor . We got two doubles, although it was. 

Host - Taylor: I was disappointed. You switched up the uh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Guest - Rob: Yeah. I have to say it was real special on that morning. Waking up your voice in the morning. That was talk about no expectations, uh, prior to the trip 

Host - Taylor: that I was probably singing. It's not always 

rainbows and butterflies.

Host - Taylor: Yeah. But 

Host - Eric: you know, in, in sober travel too. I mean, and, and we're hinting at this, think about all the things that we were able to do in those three days or four, three and a half days. I mean, the fact that you guys went, the night you [00:13:00] got in, the day you got in, and I know Taylor left super early in the morning, and probably you did as well, Rob, but here you are at what, 10 o'clock at night, deciding to trek down to the Brooklyn Bridge, um, from where you were staying, which was with subways and everything.

About what, an hour, an hour, 

Guest - Rob: 10 minutes or something? Uh, it was the what, the, the 6, 7, 9 to the Ace? Yeah. Yep. 

Host - Eric: Well, first off, navigating the subways. Think about trying to do that if you were drunk. Oh, no way. No, and and also even think about that night, what normally we would've been doing if we were all active.

We certainly wouldn't have been on a subway going into Brooklyn Bridge. 

Host - Taylor: I would've seen the inside of some really cool bars, and yeah, I probably would've seen the inside of a nightclub to finish it all off. But then the next day I would've completely given up the day because I would've been hungover, or I would've been awake, but then still drunk throughout the entire thing.

And the memory of those events that I've done in the past, they all turn to blurs. , [00:14:00] even if you think you remember them, they all turn to blurs and you really don't get to feel the and connect with individuals. Like, I really got to know Rob way better on this trip. And also just kind of shed that uncomfortableness that comes with beginning sobriety and also just why I drank in the first place.

Shed all that shit and then just hit the fuck it button and go out and experience things.

When 

Host - Taylor: we set up our travel, when we actually go to different places in sobriety, we all did something that didn't used to be in our itinerary, and that thing was where are we gonna go Hit a. Where are we gonna go find a place where like-minded individuals collect and we don't know them, and they get to share and we get to share and we get to talk.

Host - Eric: We ended up in a meeting on Sunday night, so, [00:15:00] or Sunday evening that was, uh, midtown, uh, and it when you walked up to where we had to go up to the meeting, the, the stairwell was right next to a bar, number one, and then we 

Host - Taylor: walked up. It was above a bar. Yeah. It was above an Irish pub. on top of that. Right. An Irish pub.

Host - Eric: Perfect. And when walked in, it was like we walked into somebody's apartment, 

Host - Taylor: not even like I wa we walked into somebody's clothes closet of somebody's apartment. Trust me. 

Host - Eric: That is somebody's apartment. New New York is, uh, famous for closets. Oh shit. 

Host - Taylor: I forgot where I was. Yeah, that's right. Yeah. 

Host - Eric: and them costing a lot of fucking money to be there too.

Host - Taylor: And we're not gonna obviously talk about necessarily like the individuals in the room and stuff because we wanna protect people's anonymity. But the meeting itself awesome. Right. He's incredible. He's really 

Guest - Rob: good. They wound up being hosted by a traveler [00:16:00] visitor from the uk. 

Host - Taylor: Right. 

Guest - Rob: They gave her the floor, which was incredible cause we were there to visit our friend who is from Awesome.

Yes. So what are the, what are the chances of that? That was so bizarre. Right? And then to get to meet people from New Yorker, new Yorkers who meet above a bar in a closet with a gal from the UK and us, they're just goofing around and we're, you know, we get done eating and we go over there. I think our buddy will set that up.

Right. He found the rooms app and. Yeah. Was it? Yeah, I think it was, will that set that up? Or Eric, I forget. But boy, we, we just walk in and I would've never had the guts to do that. I would've been like, nah, screw this. I just, no , no, I, well, a, I would've been drunk, so that would've been, 

Host - Taylor: that would've been awkward.

It was even funnier for me because initially I was told something, or at least I heard something when the meeting got started. [00:17:00] That gave me a huge pucker factor. Man, if you know anything about different types of meetings in the world of recovery, you do not ever want to accidentally happen upon a women's meeting.

And, and. Be a man. And I swear, I thought I heard when she opened up the meeting, say, this is a women's meeting. And I went, oh fuck. . We stayed through the whole thing and you know, I was under the impression the entire time that it was a women's meeting and they were so sweet and so accepting. I later found out that I was completely wrong in what I heard.

Right. Like, I think I just had heard them say that we do have women's meetings and they're on this date, but that wasn't this one. 

Host - Eric: And there were also two men that came in, like later on. Right. And one, one spoke, one spoken, one left, but oh, one 

Guest - Rob: was from South America. 

Host - Eric: Yeah. Yep. He was there on a, he was going to a two week, uh, music study.

Music 

Guest - Rob: music study. [00:18:00] 

Host - Taylor: Jazz or whatever. How crazy. Yeah, it's just so crazy the people that you meet and the opportunities that are available because you start exposing yourself to these individuals that you would never in a million years even remotely go and find out or do. And honestly, it's kind of a weird, cool thing that only exists in this world of recovery, right?

Like you don't necessarily find yourself seeking out these types of random happenstances in your everyday life, especially when you're drinking. And if you do, it's at a bar and you don't really get anything other than a bar buddy. Out of it. Whereas now you get somebody that wants to go on bike rides, you get somebody who you know says, Hey, I host meetings on this online.

You guys should come and attend it sometime in the future. And it just builds relationships and allows you to connect and open up. And it's such a really cool opportunity when we start to go [00:19:00] on trips and travel more, what actually ends up happening is we're looking for meetings. We're holding ourselves accountable and creating this new, beautiful little life.

In the words of Rob. 

Host - Eric: Well, and also, I mean, I would throw another word in here that we could probably all talk about, but the idea of presence. Mm-hmm. , without being inebriated, we were able to be present in, in every moment, you know? And I think about that, that time that you guys were all here, and every single day that we were all together had its own moment.

And its own thing that was going on that I thought was really cool. You could really feel everybody just in that, you know, in that, in that space. And that was, that was a nice place to be for sure. 

Guest - Rob: Would you say that part of that is authenticity? So with part of the, of what you get in these communities if you're vulnerable, is, I'm authentic by the fact I'm showing up.

I'm saying to everybody, my, [00:20:00] my dig deepest, darkest, secret secret where I spent a lot of years in my own head with shame and guilt, and it's out on the table without even me having to vocalize. It's on the table. We come to the party all in recovery, right? So it's not like I'm trying to hide anything , and it's not like hearing the stories now of the term, the terminal uniqueness in my mind is gone.

We're, we're all different, but we're all very similar. We're all just trying to live a life, get some purpose and meaning, and quit trying to. Salve over the wounds that we had from whatever trauma we brought into this thing. Right? Right. So we go up to this stuff and it's like we go deep. And our friend from over at the pond, his wife had mentioned that she got to see and was impressed with the level of authenticity.

And it was almost like we were all deep long-term friends that had just picked up the conversation that we had just [00:21:00] finished. Wow. A, a day or two ago. And some of these people I hadn't met in person, but I've seen in little boxes on the, on my 32 inch monitor here at home, I've seen in boxes, but I'd never met.

Right. It's just like, Hey, how's, how's it going with this? And I know them and they know me. Right. And there's something about that in sober travel. I think that is unique from any of my other experiences because a lot of times I'm kind of in my own head. Trying to navigate, knowing what to say and what to do and how, you know, how do I have to act in this, in this situation?

And I don't think I did that once on this trip.

Host - Eric: Well, speaking about being in your own head, I do have a question. You know, a lot of us early on in recovery struggle, That voice, you know, that voice like, okay, it's time to go drink, it's time to go do [00:22:00] something. Right. So how do you manage through that in a travel scenario when you know, maybe people around you are drinking, maybe something's going on.

How do you deal with that 

Guest - Rob: voice? Um, I had a really good test June-ish of 2020. Mexico was opening back up. It was a little break from Covid. We thought it was all over before Omicron hit. And wife and I and my, our best friends went down to Mexico with an all inclusive and it's the first time I'd ever done that.

Cause I typically tend to do more go, go, go type vacations. And this was just a sit in the chase lounges on the cool river. The lazy river, and then go walk the ocean. Um, it was all inclusive, it was all you could drink. It was part of the, and it was a really inexpensive deal cause they were trying to get us all to go back down there.

Wow. That was pretty tough. I had to put it out there to the community. I had to do some planning ahead of time. I had to become accountable. I've got a sponsor. I'm active in aa. It's one of my tools, but I had to put it out to the group we're [00:23:00] in, and I had to let everybody know it was there as well. And you know what?

It's kind of like that first time I went to July 4th party, a month after I got sober on my block. There was a lot more going on in my head prior to the event than when I was in the event and actually experienced it. It wasn't like people were trying to hand me alcohol. I was very worried about them serving me real stuff.

And I found out they, this isn't their first barbecue. Somebody told me in community, just tell 'em me, you're allergic. Like peanuts, you'll have an anaphylactic reaction and have to go to the hospital if you touch alcohol. So I got put in their computer as allergic, like medically dead allergic . Wow. Which I am allergic, and I would be dead 

and 

Host - Taylor: I will die.

You'll go to the hospital. I'm allergic too, man. I break out in handcuffs, so, and you won't 

Host - Eric: passco and you will not collect $200. You'll 

Guest - Rob: owe $200 actually. So every time I got the glass, you know, it was like 90, 90 [00:24:00] degrees and it was, you know, oh it's wonderful. Trees coming off the ocean, but on all my glasses, their little sweat on them was this receipt it said, They had a picture of, uh, skull and crossbones, medical allergy,

That 

Host - Taylor: is, yeah. That's awesome. That's an amazing form of accountability. Holy crap, dude. Yeah. Yeah, it worked. And you know what's so crazy about that day? Because you, I love that our stories are so close in timelines because I had my July 4th party the same, same day I am at a pool party at my buddy's apartment complex.

I am also one day after celebrating my birthday because my birthday is July 3rd. . So I'm hitting double whammies in my first 30 days of sobriety, which then goes to show that it doesn't fucking matter what event is on the horizon. We can always find a reason to drink. You just need to [00:25:00] hit the stop button, right?

Well, I'm gonna stop drinking after I do this event or that event. No, you just gotta fucking hit the stop button because there's always gonna be an event, there's always a reason to drink. So for me, I had multiple events coming up. I had the 4th of July, I had my birthday. Sadly, uh, one of my friends committed suicide, put a gun to his head and pulled the trigger in my first 30 days.

So, and alcohol, uh, he had just turned 21. So like, Through all of this though, thinking about that specific day and being held accountable, right? Because that's what you're getting at is you were held accountable by saying, Hey, I got this fucking allergy I can't drink today. I told everybody that day, I was like, and everyone knew that I was not going to be drinking and I had just gone through my birthday not drinking.

So in all of that accountability and just telling people ahead of time, that's one thing. But I would also say telling the right people is such a huge factor, cuz I remember a couple years prior, In St. Louis, I had [00:26:00] tried to get sober, or at least quit drinking for a couple of days, and then my buddy hit me up saying, Hey, I'm one block up the street at the karaoke bar right now.

Come on down, it's my buddy's birthday. Let's drink. Let's have fun. And I said, okay, this is my first test. I'm gonna go to this party and I'm not gonna drink. This is my test. This is the universe telling me that I can do this. And I went there, and I'm not great friends with this guy, but his dad was like, Hey, you're doing shots with us.

And I said, no, I'm not. And he is like, yeah, but you are. And I said, no, I'm not. And he is like, okay, why? And I was like, because I'm trying to quit drinking. And he was like, quit tomorrow. Fuck that shit. Do shots. And so I did shots. Right. Those aren't your friends. Those aren't the people you want. Those aren't the people you want as your accountability buddies, right?

Like I didn't even ever see that guy again. Nor did he know that he was contributing to a bigger problem. And nor is it his fault. It's my fault. [00:27:00] But in all of that story comes why it's so important, and I tell all of that because you have to remind yourself of the bad, so then you can know why you're trying to change and do and do different and do better.

Like I didn't ever think accountability would be a fucking big deal to me until I experienced things like that. And not only just accountability, but the right kind of accountability. Yeah. 

Guest - Rob: And I think when you talk about your experience prior and, and how hard it was to. Went offered, et cetera. And you know, we really didn't need an excuse.

I didn't need an excuse. I feel bad about how many trips I took with the family. Oh, where? Oof. I just wasn't in recovery yet. I wasn't there. And how many, how many events that I wasn't fully present and even crossed the line and created ruined anniversaries. And it's just now that that was all part of my past.

It, it's my [00:28:00] past. I can't dwell on it. What's cool now is I can go to France with my wife. I just tell everybody, I'm not having these a pair of tea. I know it's your culture. I'm not, and they're all, they're all like, why I, I can't drink , just leave it at that. And I now I can look back, I can, I've got three years under my belt doing that.

We'll be going back in May. I know I can do. And I've got that positivity that it's like anything else, you do it once, it's really scary. You do it twice, it's less scary. It's like you're taking your cut in half, in half the fear and all the motions and everything that go to it. Every time that you go through it and you come through and go, wow, that was really cool.

And I don't have to worry about what I said and what I did and what I screwed up. And, and I felt like towards the end I felt like I was holding back a team of horses. I'd go somewhere and there'd be alcohol and it was like, oh, trying to pace myself. And I never ever could, that's part of this whole curse, I guess, is I, you know, one is too many [00:29:00] and twenties not enough, or , something 

Host - Taylor: like that.

One's too many and, uh, thousands. Not 

Guest - Rob: enough. Thousands not enough. Yeah. Thank you. Sorry. So I, I say on the sober travel, complete night and day difference. Now there's still stuff that happens, you know, itineraries get mixed up, things happen, you know, you get lost and, but, When you're present, my experience is it's just a lot better trip because it's like, my intent is to have time with my friends, my family, whoever I'm with, and to be present and create memories and to eat some good food.

Host - Taylor: right? 

Host - Eric: Mm-hmm. . No, absolutely. And, and the other thing, you know, in, in terms of not worrying about drinking anymore, it allows me to plan. So I'm a big history buff and, and I love, uh, like learning about cities and the history behind a city and how it started and all that kind of stuff. So I look for things to do.

when I'm on [00:30:00] vacation and I'm not any more worried about, well, I need a block of time to be able to go out and party and have a good time. And so I'm gonna have to plan this event tomorrow to start no earlier than noon because I'm gonna need my sleep to get over my hangover. I don't have to do that anymore.

And it's funny, like going to Colorado and, and going hiking out there and, and my brother and I have done a couple of, um, organized trips that are, that are out there. And a lot of times, especially if you're going hiking up in the mountains, they, they wanna meet at eight o'clock, seven, eight o'clock in the morning.

Yeah. Which now is fine. That's not an issue for me. It used to be a huge issue. There's no way. Seven o'clock in the morning, are you outta your mind puke and rally? Are there some afternoon hikes? Uh, maybe I'll do that. But think about trying to go into the altitude hungover. I mean that's, I used to 

Guest - Rob: hike fourteeners and bring whiskey up with me.

Oh 

Host - Taylor: my. Brilliant. When I first moved to Colorado from St. Louis, we all know elevation of St. Louis. I mean, you're pretty much, you know, sea level for the most part. [00:31:00] Some parts you're a little bit higher, but it's flat. And I moved out to Colorado and I was like off for an entire month. And so how do you get through feeling off?

Well, you drink, you know, and I had a month waiting on furniture to arrive and of course you drink to meet the neighbors and drink because it's new and different. And then you start going skiing, snowboarding, things like that. And you go from 5,000 feet up to 10,000 real quick to the base of the mountain before you travel up another two miles.

Not joking to the very top, and you start skiing and snowboarding down, whoa, holy crap, man. I was feeling so crappy all the time for an entire month before my body adapted, and I guarantee I could have adapted a whole lot quicker if I wasn't drinking. And on the flip side of that, when I got sober and started going back and traveling to the mountains for [00:32:00] day trips by myself with no significant other because I had been left, it was such a game changer to be present, to be held accountable with a program and to not feel like crap and really see the forest for the trees and the beauty that is just in between all of it.

Yep. 

Host - Eric: Absolutely. I agree with all of that.

Host - Taylor: We're almost building like a sober itinerary for everybody to more or less follow here, right? So it sounds to me like we have some criteria that a lot of people should consider when they're going on a trip and it's gonna be a sober one, or they're gonna make attempts at being sober on that specific trip.

A big one is having a plan that's first and foremost, de develop a plan, whether or not you're a meeting goer or whatever. At least having a way out of [00:33:00] situations is an amazing plan to have. Whether it's a, a long sober trip or a trip down to the grocery store, they're all trips in my mind. Having a way out of the conversation, a way out of the event, a backup, an excuse, a whatever, it doesn't matter.

We're great at excuses. Why can't we put 'em to good use and use them to keep us sober instead of to keep us drunk? Having a plan. And another one is being fluid or lowering our expectations of the evening because we have an expectation to have fun sober. Well, there's been many events that I've gone to where I did not have any fucking fun sober, and I wish I would've been drunk there.

But guess what? It didn't happen. Oh, well, scratch the board. Go home. Hit the reset button because they're not always gonna be great. What's another one, guys? Well, 

Host - Eric: accountability. You know, Rob talked about the trip to Mexico and how he let people know in the group that he was going and how he let people [00:34:00] know there.

I think accountability and getting it out there saying, Hey, listen, I don't drink and I'm not going to drink, and whatever else you want to tell 'em is fine. But that accountability piece, whether it's to the people you're with or it's to people that are in your program, quote unquote, that you can reach out to if you were struggling.

That's so super important. And I think accountability is something that we continuously do. I mean, I still do it, you know, my, it's a little bit more built in now because my family and my friends know I'm not drinking. And so they would be on me in two seconds if I said, Hey, I think I'm gonna drink tonight.

Like, what? Wait, what? And I actually had a friend, she was like, well, what are you doing? And I'm like, I'm going to a meeting. Oh, are, are you all right? Are you, are you thinking about drinking? Why are you going to a meeting? I'm like, no. People go to meetings when they are feeling fine. You know? It's just, it's a place 

Host - Taylor: to go.

I go to meetings so I can deal with the aliens. and the aliens are everybody else that can drink like normal fucking people. Weirdos. [00:35:00] Yes. It's disgusting. Are just like 

Host - Eric: the monkeys that run around in my head just trying to keep them 

Host - Taylor: organized. Exactly. It kind of sets and I think another one that was said by Rob was intentions setting your intention or uh, your priorities, right?

Like what are your priorities for your trip and what are your intentions on this trip, right? Like are my intentions to find all the cool bars? That was definitely my intention once upon a time and I still will value history and a good bar. You know, like we actually even went to, uh, the Hard Rock Cafe and we actually had great conversations with the staff about people that they've had famous run through there.

So, you know, there is still fun in those type of activities, but I am now setting an intention on, okay, where is my sober places? Where can I go if I need a way out and. What do I do when my expectations are not met? Because expectations [00:36:00] are, in my opinion, the beginnings of resentment and resentment is best served with, uh, poison because that's all you're getting.

You're drinking poison and expecting somebody else to die. So what, when I have expectations, I'm on the verge of resentment and I'm on the verge of poisoning myself and my entire trip. 

Guest - Rob: Well, and I think we flip the script because before when I would travel, it was centered around me escaping, uh, to drink.

Hmm. I would candy wrap it with, oh, I'm a single malt scotch connoisseur. Right. You know, I'm this sophisticated guy and I like the Smokey PD Isla, so I'll have a lare with uh, you know, maybe some, um, bread pudding, you know, cuz that's what they do. Right? Yeah. That lasted for one or two drinks and then I was off to the races.

And the script then was, I thought that that was living life. I thought that was, that was [00:37:00] as good as life could get. You know, meanwhile, I'm leaving people in the dust. I'm not remembering things. I blacked out. I rode my bike, our motorcycle to the, uh, Arctic Circle with my best buddy on the Dalton Highway.

We polished off that memory with way too much to drink. So I kind of ruined all of these great things, which were in themselves. Okay. And great. But they could have been so much better. So the, the script flipped is, You're gonna have a lot of fun when you're sober. Hell, you're gonna have a lot more fun when you're sober.

Yep. You're gonna remember stuff. You're not gonna be hungover. Absolutely. You're not gonna be going, what did I say? What did I do? Oh, oh, I know what I did. Or, you're not gonna run the blame shame game. You know, I gotta quit this. And then back at it by 10:00 AM the next day With the bloody, bloody 

Host - Taylor: Mary.

You're taking out a lot of unintentional anxiety. Yeah. And self-inflicted anxiety. Yes. Right. So the 

Guest - Rob: travel and the, and the the fun is a whole lot better [00:38:00] now. Somebody early is gonna be listening to this going, yeah, these guys are in a cult full of shit. . There's no way. I've never had fun unless it involved getting drunk or, you know, wait, you're not Nicole.

Uh, no, not Nicole. Oh shit. But you have to trust me and you have to trust us that it is a whole lot better. It it really, it. It's just, it is. It's e It is easier too. A whole lot easier. Taylor was talking about hard pick your hard. It was a lot harder when I took some of the initial trips to France with my wife and they have an you, uh, somebody visits you have an a pair of, it's just a thing.

And so we visited 10 places. I had 10, a pair of tee, and you can figure out how that day ended. It was a train wreck. Right. Because I had more than that. I had, you know, some 'em were doubles. I don't have to deal with that. That was a really bad deal and the next day was really bad trying to explain to the relatives, you know, the flu quote unquote.

Yeah, right.[00:39:00] 

Host - Eric: We talk about it being hard to not drink, but what I heard, something I thought was interesting and it's harder to keep up the facade of drinking that we all end up in versus not drinking and not having that worry anymore. That, that anxiety of how do I hide this from everybody? How do I, you know, ramp up my drinking where I need it to be.

but hide from everybody else how bad it really is. You know? I mean, I've heard this story over and over and over again. Right. You know, and I don't have to worry about that anymore. That's not taking up space 

Host - Taylor: in my head. I never knew how much effort I was putting forth in that fictional world I was creating until you actually get out of it.

And you take that very first. Sometimes you're months sober when you take this breath, but you know the breath I'm talking about where you shed all of that pressure and stress to [00:40:00] hold on to all those narratives. It's like you're weaving a web of lies and you have to keep weaving or else it's all gonna crumble.

But once you realize that you can just let it crumble and fall away, you're still okay. And then you take that

and right there you're like, Who am I? I I'm this, I I'm somebody else. Now I'm somebody who doesn't have to pretend to be anything other than I am and I don't have to try and create a narrative that is completely false about myself, about everything. 

Guest - Rob: And that's Laura McCowan in her. We are the luckiest where I steal my, you know, nice little life.

He also talks about being one version of myself, which is back to authenticity, which is thrown into this whole mix. The opposite of having to try to act and be something that I can't control and that everybody else is, is, is seeing right [00:41:00] through. Anyway, I don't know who I was. I don't know who I was. I thought I was fooling.

Anyway, it's a whole lot easier to just be than to try to hold, to try to keep all that going. Uh, I didn't understand that until I felt, until I experienced it, until I had some of that, I, I had to get some of it to 

Host - Taylor: understand. Right. And when you start to do that, , the universe starts working for you instead of what felt like against you, and you start seeing a shift.

But that shift doesn't happen overnight, right? No. Like there might be a series of dominoes that were already falling over that you need to see to the end of that line of them falling over before you can actually start to see the positive things come. But whenever it happens, because life is a bitch, you know, but eventually it actually starts to flip over and you start stacking dominoes back up again, and you can actually start to see a little bit of a picture being painted with this beautiful thing.

When that starts happening, then [00:42:00] you're awake enough and clearheaded enough, and you're coming out of that morning fog to start seeing where life is working for you instead of against you. You start to see all these weird things occurring where. That guy that you met at that one meeting a couple months ago comes up to you and says, Hey man, what you said that day really had an impact on me.

Boom. That's the universe giving you something back for free at the cost of nothing. Right? Or, hey, you went on a trip and didn't get anxiety one time. That's the universe giving you something back. And you don't, you don't account for those. You remember all the negativity, but you don't account for when the universe works positive for you.

And all of this I'm leading to is another specific instance on our trip that we all shared together where the universe just smacked us with gratitude. It smacked us. The [00:43:00] table at John's? Yes, the table at John's. So there's this pizza place that will wanted to take us to, and we literally walked what felt like.

5,000 mile. What's that song? If I could walk five? Yeah, we did it. Okay. We, yeah, we listened to the song eight times. No, I'm kidding. Um, when we got there, it's John's Pizza. Is that it? I don't know. It's 

Guest - Rob: one of the two. Yeah, it's one of the two that are debated is the best. Right. From a foodie standpoint, John's is debated.

Host - Taylor: Is top. Top. So there's this photo that I have, and I'll actually add it into the show notes where we're sitting at this really long table in the middle of this restaurant, and by restaurant, it's up to New York restaurant standards in terms of like you're being in another closet again, like everything's all very, very tight, very narrow.

But we were able to get all these tables and sit at them. 13 of us, 13 of us [00:44:00] were at this table and the picture was taken. Right? Well, I ended up posting about it because, , you would look at it and just think that this is somebody's pre-planned Thanksgiving dinner. That's what it looks like. And just think about it.

Just like that a guy takes a photo at the head of the table and it's a long group of individuals that called ahead and had all this good to go. That could not be further from the truth, right? And instead of me saying that, I'm actually gonna read a section of a post I made in one of our sober groups. I titled that the things I Choose to Remember.

While you may think this post is about a sobriety meetup in New York, I'm actually going to focus on a different aspect of this trip, alignment and harmony. This trip was amazing, and these people are just as awesome outside of the Zoom room as they are within it. Our stories converge on this trip to finally meet a friend in recovery.

Craig and his wonderful family, which they are, they're very wonderful, but I couldn't help but notice [00:45:00] something simple in the air. I experienced a sense of ease and effortlessness throughout this trip. I wasn't in a hurry or irritated by lines, people, places, or things. I flowed with the days and set my expectation meter to zero.

Odd things began to occur like peace and joy. I've shared many moments with these states throughout my recovery, but this one was definitely one to remember. It's good to remember these moments. When I am aligned and harmonizing with life, I often feel as though life is out to get me or cause me issue. I find myself constantly using the phrase, anything that can go wrong will, or of course this is happening to me.

I forget about all the times like this, where if it flows, it goes, and what you resist persists. I flip the script and find a sense of ease. I need to remind myself of these moments when life starts [00:46:00] to get lifey again. As we walked many miles to this one amazing pizza place in New York, I couldn't have expected what was awaiting us, what the universe already had planned.

See, we didn't call ahead for these seats. We didn't have them placed together or wait to be seated. We walked in. The only seats available was this long row of tables already connected, and all we needed was the TV spotlight to make this fictional stage event more surreal. So through the next chaotic time where the world is against me, I will remind myself of these moments where it was in my favor.

Maybe it always has. Just, maybe it was me who needs to remain open to the positive instead of honing in on the negative. That is great. That was incredible. 

Host - Eric: So incredible. Because you know what? That's [00:47:00] everything you said in there is what we all do, right? I mean, how many of us would've worried about that?

Like you would've thought, and, and I don't know if Will tried to call ahead or not, but you would've thought will be like, oh man, I, how are we gonna seat these people? You know, we have 15 people. You know what? 

Host - Taylor: Leave it up to Will to have called ahead and then just never had the guts 

to tell us 

Host - Taylor: that he had that all set up.

Now that I think about it will. You're a dick . You know what will's 

Guest - Rob: my higher 

Host - Taylor: power?

God. Is that you? No, it's Will. It's Will . We're banging on the floorboards. Shut up. 

Host - Eric: I don't know if he called ahead. I don't think he did. I don't think he saw. I didn't, I never saw him on his phone and the way that he was dealing with all of that, that day, it seemed like he was kind of playing it by ear.

And you know, when him and I talked about it, he said, you know, I wasn't really sure what, you know, how that was gonna play out, you know, that moment. So [00:48:00] he just tried to pick a good place to go 

Host - Taylor: eat. I do remember he was just as shocked when we walked in there. He was, yes. He was just as shocked. So I don't think that was faked at all whatsoever.

But you did kind of catch me in my thoughts for a second there with that, with that statement. Eric, you, you almost had me. But what I'm saying 

Host - Eric: is that what you just said was what is is so important to stop ourselves and, and think about. Right. You know, the idea that the universe is there for us. We've been resisting a universe forever in our addiction.

We're not doing that anymore. We're, I mean, I love the way Taylor set it up of I didn't have expectations. I didn't go into this trip with any, like, this has to happen. That has to happen. That's gotta happen. It was whatever was gonna be the day was gonna be the day. And how that ended up playing out. I mean, if you look at the whole trip, right?

That is one of the gifts of recovery, in my opinion, that we don't mm-hmm. , there's so many gifts that we don't talk about, that [00:49:00] we don't bring up. And, and again, that's why Taylor, I love the way that you put that, because that is something to really think about. That, that was probably the universe talking to all of us together, saying, I love the fact that you're all together, you're all in harmony, you're all connected, and I'm gonna set you up and hook you up with a table at this famous pizza 

Host - Taylor: place.

Well, and I bring it up because I'm not there. All the fucking time, even in sobriety, I am not living in that head space constantly. I'm not a monk. I'm not somebody who is able to achieve this oneness on a regular basis. So I talk about it when it happens because it's beautiful and I wanna be excited about it when it does happen because my next trip coming up, oh man, the universe has something in store to test the fuck outta me.

I guarantee it , and it's gonna suck and it's gonna suck. But guess what? I wouldn't enjoy all the good shit if I didn't have the bad stuff too. So I can [00:50:00] find the positive if I look for it and I'm open to it. And I'm more open when I'm sober. 

Guest - Rob: And if we would've walked in there and it was busy, we would've gone within two blocks, probably gone to Joe's, which is rated as their neck and neck for the best.

And we would've all gotten a slice from Joe's, and we would've sat on the front, on the street, on the sidewalk. , 

Host - Eric: right? Or if there's just a bunch of tables, you know, we would've split up in, uh, you know, three or four people 

Host - Taylor: at a table and there was nothing that could have stopped us from having a good time.

It just was a little icing on the cake. It wasn't something that like, now the next time I go there, that's my expectation. No, cuz then I'm back into me again and I'm less in everything else going on around me. And in that moment, I think the point I was making was I was not in me. I was in everything around collectively.

And it was a beautiful moment to share with everybody because everybody was in that same head space. We were all in it together and it was such a joy. And these are just one of the many [00:51:00] gifts that we get when we travel sober and when we shed the shame and express ourselves freely and just allow the authentic self to shine through and all the goofy personalities that we had.

We had many different individuals from many different walks of life, all just hanging out together, and we never would've talked if it wasn't for this bond of pain and suffering, bringing us together to find joy, happiness. Mm-hmm. . So do sober 

Host - Eric: travel. Everybody is awesome. I 

Host - Taylor: highly recommend it. Yes, a hundred percent.

Host - Eric: We, so we talked about accountability, we talked about acceptance, talked about, you know, having a plan, expectations. 

Host - Taylor: Yeah, the only thing left is special apps for me. If I'm gonna go find a meeting in an area myself, I'm a 12 stepper as well, similar to Rob. So [00:52:00] there is an app, there's actually two different ones.

One is called meetings. Yeah. And it has a picture of a chair on it, and you can click on it and it'll gi, it'll bring up online meetings, it'll bring up in-person meetings. It'll use your GPS to find meetings that are near you. And it'll also say what type of meeting it is, if it's open, if it's closed, if it's handicapped friendly, if it is a men's meeting, a women's meeting, a book study or something like that.

It'll identify all those things. Another great one is, um, everything aa, that's another amazing one that I've used in the past. Very similar setup. And then the final one has nothing to do with recovery at all whatsoever, but it's all about building connection and being that. Adventurer and explorer that you probably have always thought you were but never were in your drinking.

But hey, you're silver now Meet up. That's a great app. If you want to just meet up with a group of people that are going kayaking in an area that you've never been before in your own state, let [00:53:00] alone if you're gonna be traveling somewhere else. And then the final thing I'll say is a little trick of the trade before I pass it off to other people to give their apps they might like to use on a regular basis is, if you did not know this, please know this and hear me.

Now, if you go on cruises like I do, if you look in the directory or if you look in the events for each and every day that gets dropped off in your bedroom, and it doesn't matter what cruise line you go on does not matter, you will look for, and it's probably in the chapel of the cruise ship, it'll say Friend of bill or friends of Bill, and that is code for.

A meeting that is going to take place on that ship for people in recovery. And no, it doesn't mean you have to be in aa. That does not. That is no. Take that preconceived notion and throw it out the window, maybe up your ass don't really care. It's not true. It's a hundred percent not true. That meeting space is there for anybody who [00:54:00] needs to say, I have a problem and I don't wanna do this anymore.

Okay? And it's a safe place for you to go for an hour every single day that you're cruising and connect with the five other individuals that are on that ship that chose to do the same thing as you. And what's really cool is then you start to see them. Throughout your time on the cruise ship and you already have a best friend because they suffered a fuck ton just like you did, and all of a sudden you're best friend's over it and it's amazing.

So those are my tips, my tricks and apps for silver travel. I have the meeting 

Host - Eric: app on my phone as well. And what's great about it is it, regardless of where you are in that given day, you can find meetings close to your location, whatever your location might be, which is really nice. And they start with the closest.

and work their way down, so, mm-hmm. , if you're in a, in a city that you don't know and you're a meeting goer, and I'm talking specifically aa, then you can find a meeting. But also I've found that you can go [00:55:00] online for other groups and find local meetings in that place. So if you were, let's say you're know, you're going somewhere for a week and you wanted to go to a smart recovery meeting or something like that, you can Google that for that area and find meetings in that local area that maybe you could hit while you're gone, just for your own accountability.

The other thing I was gonna say, and this isn't an app or anything like that, but it's something to know, cuz I didn't know this and it's pretty cool, but some bands that have big followings, you know, and I'm thinking about the jam communities specifically, they actually have their. Groups that meet, like I know Phish has his own group that are people in recovery that meet at these concerts just to be accountability for each other, which is 

Host - Taylor: really cool.

Yeah. I'm so glad you said that. And I kind of wish my wife was in here right now because she would be all over it. Um, I do know that Pretty Lights is another band [00:56:00] and they have a pretty Lights family of sober people. Inside of this Pretty Lights Family, there's another little group inside of it that is the sober, uh, family of Pretty Lights.

And it's amazing that a lot of these bands have these micro communities of sober individuals. It's awesome. Right? Well you 

Host - Eric: see a lot of these bands where these, these guys are now sober themselves. I mean Yep. All the guys in Phish are sober now. You hear about it all the time. I know there's a band, and I think it's a band.

You guys follow Taylor, but I can't remember the name of it. But the lead singer is in recovery and does this big spiel on stage about his recovery. 

Host - Taylor: Five Finger death punch. Yeah, I think that's it. Yep. Five Finger death punch, which I will quickly say if you have not heard his speech that went viral. Um, I would look up five Finger death Punch, sober speech at a concert, something like that.

Something along those lines. It's very [00:57:00] powerful. It's about a four or five minute speech that he gives. And I was at his concerts, drinking and getting hammered myself and in the mosh pits when he was in his active addiction. And I have yet to go to one of his concerts where he's sober. I am looking forward to it though.

I've been a fan of his since the beginning. And I yes, thank you for bringing that up. I could totally talk about Five Finger Death Munch for a while. Uh, they're amazing. So I'm so glad that he's sober now too. I 

Guest - Rob: would think that kind of the d the DNA of what we're talking about is some sort of community.

So however a person finds that, um, I know. I wasn't successful at all when I tried to do it myself. So I think the underlying urge or , if the lessons learned on my part is go find a community. It doesn't matter what it is. One is, is as afraid you, you think you are gonna [00:58:00] be and as vulnerable as you think you're gonna have to be.

And as bad as you think it's gonna be all, that's no way. Like I was trying to say before, um, these people are all like-minded. You're starting from the commonality that we're all drunks, right? So kind of work backwards from there. Find, find a community like we did. We, we mentioned recovery elevator, and that just happened to be the one that our universe picked for us.

But go, go seek these out. The, the recovery elevator can't be the only one that has these private groups where you get to know people. I know Omar Pinto down in Peru. I'm trying to remember where he's 

Host - Taylor: at. 

Host - Eric: Cost. Costa Rica. 

Guest - Rob: Costa Rica. Sorry. He's got one right. And uh, all you gotta do is type in Google search or in, in Spotify type in recovery.

Host - Eric: Laura McCowen has one that I was a part of for, for 

Guest - Rob: three years. Laura McCowen has one. Yes. Yeah, that's sober guy. And Grace. And Grace 

Host - Taylor: [00:59:00] has one. 

Host - Eric: Annie Grace has one that's, yeah. I didn't start in her community, but she's like, you would almost, you could almost say she's one of the, one of the pioneers, you know, in this whole online kind of stuff.

Guest - Rob: For sure. Yeah. And I know there's the L G B T Q, there's a gentleman I met at, I don't know what he was doing in Denver, cuz he lives, I don't know. He lives here. That's right. He lives here. He's got a podcast. 10,000 views a week. Nice. I think he's the sober gay, I think is his channel. Um, one of my friends is really into him.

So, and there's really no excuse to, to try to find these groups to plug into like our experience, you know, our experience is our experience. And I wasn't looking for this. I had no clue that this would be even possible, right? But, 

Host - Taylor: I wouldn't trade it. And recovery is sweeping the world, not the nation. It's sweeping the world.

So to all of our listeners, we've already stated on last episode, we have listeners from over seven different countries right now. [01:00:00] Yep. So wherever you're listening in from, it doesn't have to be these things, even though I think a lot of these ones are online. So you would have access to them as well. Get out there and look in your communities, what those apps look like for your area and what those Google searches or internet searches look like in your relative area, and start getting involved and connecting in those spaces because it's hard to pick up the phone and look up that stuff.

It's a 10,000 brick, 10,000 pound brick. But once you do this and more, this meaning what we're talking about here and more is waiting on the other side. I now 

Host - Eric: have friends all over the United States, so like when my brother and I plan a trip, I always think, oh well, Odets in San Diego. I can go see her or, oh, um, oh, Carrie's up in Northern California.

I can go see her or, or Taylor and Rob are in Colorado and, and I can go see them, you know, so there's all these [01:01:00] people and that's, for me, that's kind of built in accountability. I can touch base with them, I can connect with them. I can go have coffee or lunch or whatever with them, and that helps me stay on.

even when I'm on vacation. So that's the beauty of a lot of 

Host - Taylor: these groups, for sure. Yeah. And if you relapse, you have still free places to stay, so it's still worth it. No,

Wait, no, wait. Is that that sleazy brain that I have not gotten rid of yet? Is that what that is? Oh shit. Fuck. I guess I still have more work to do, guys. I guess I should come back next week for another episode. My brain's still fucked. . All right. 

Guest - Rob: I'm gonna be loving and accepting if you relapse on me, but you're also gonna get the, Hey, how did that work out for you,

Host - Taylor: Yes. How'd that research go? And no, you cannot come and stay at my house.

What's your insurance policy? Is it high enough to cover the damages? I'm about to. Right. Hey, Rob, it's been a joy [01:02:00] Yes. Talking to you for this, uh, last hour and I can't believe, as always, it flies by. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you for coming on our show. Yes, Rob, 

Guest - Rob: thank you. Thank you for inviting me. Love you guys.

Host - Eric: Hey, thank you all for listening to this show. We really 

Host - Taylor: appreciate it. Thank you so much for joining us today, and we would not be here without you. 

Host - Eric: New episodes, air every Friday morning. This show is available wherever you podcast. 

Host - Taylor: You can join the conversation throughout the week by following us on Instagram and TikTok by searching at sober the letter n Shameless.

If you would like to be a guest on our show or would simply like to send us an email about this week's topic, then please email us@sobershamelessgmail.com. You can find all these links and more in the show notes. Interested in supporting the show, then buy us a cup of coffee. That's a drink we can enjoy without regret.

Just simply navigate to buy me a [01:03:00] coffee.com/sober and shameless. That's S O B E R N S H A N E L E S S, and you can give us a cup if you'd like. We'll send you a sober and shameless sticker in the mail and post a photo on our Instagram thanking you 

for your support. Woo, 

Host - Taylor: and finally shed 

Host - Eric: that shame. Don't forget to take care of yourself today.

We love you and you 

Host - Taylor: are 

Host - Eric: worth it. 

Coming in regular, coming in hot.[01:04:00] [01:05:00]